| Delivery by pick-up truck: July 4 | | | | am now gay. Life could be worse!Chanting |
| 7.30am and I am waiting outside my building with | | | | resumes but this time it is very brief, no more |
| my car and driver. No Neung and no Khun Ying, | | | | than five minutes. The monks collect their |
| her sister. Oh well, it's Thailand so I guess I just | | | | goodies, climb into the pickup truck and off they |
| have to wait. I get an sms and it seems the taxi | | | | go. Formalities are over with. Neung's mother is |
| they called could not find their place so they are | | | | now at peace.Lunch begins for all the guests. We |
| going to be very late. Mai pen rai.8.15am Neung | | | | split into two groups. I sit with Neung, Khun Ying |
| and Ying arrive carrying 6 large bags of cat food. | | | | and seven other ladies. Most are in their 50s and |
| Hmmm, this is looking interesting. Not quite sure | | | | 60s and I am an object of fascination. They see |
| how this one gets explained. We set out for | | | | me struggling with the sitting postures and so, to |
| Rangsit. Neung explains about the cat food. Her | | | | a lot of laughing, a stool appears and I am told to |
| mother had four cats. The neighbor has been | | | | sit. My cheeks are red but the pain is gone so it's |
| feeding them but ran out of food 4 days ago, so | | | | a good tradeoff. Then the real challenge begins. |
| the cats have not eaten. Ok, that explains the cat | | | | Am I going to eat the food? Luckily I like Thai |
| food well enough!9.15am we arrive at the house in | | | | food at least as much as kon Thai so the food is |
| Rangsit and go see the neighbors. Cats arrive, | | | | no problem for me. They even begin to realise |
| fast! We give them some food and then they are | | | | that I speak quite decent Thai.Everything is going |
| joined by the neighbor's dog, who seems to eat | | | | well until we come to the durian mixed with sticky |
| cat food as willingly as she eats dog food. Well, it's | | | | rice and coconut milk. Durian is actually ok to eat |
| Thailand!We are going to do tambuun at the | | | | but this one is not ripe enough. Sticky rice is not |
| house. Neung explains that sometimes people do it | | | | something I enjoy. The mixture all together? Well |
| at the temple but it is considered "luckier" to do it | | | | I manage not to throw up but only just and, of |
| at the person's house. Something to do with | | | | course, the whole group finds this very |
| releasing the spirit. I don't pretend to understand | | | | entertaining, myself just about included. These are |
| but no problem. I ask when the monks will arrive. | | | | all good people. They are having fun. They are |
| Around 11am I am told which, obviously, means | | | | being very welcoming to me. It has been a good |
| 11.30am. everyone is always late here. All the | | | | day so far.The food is cleared away and we all |
| monk's gifts have been prepared. Money in | | | | start to clear up. Neung pays for the food which |
| envelopes, flowers and the usual bucket of | | | | means, necessarily that I pay for the food. |
| goodies - washing powder, toothpaste and so | | | | There's a lot of celebrating and five minutes later |
| on.10.30am and the monks arrive. What's going on | | | | what seems like a million bottles of beer arrive. |
| here? No one in Thailand is ever early. We'll get | | | | Seems I gave a good tip too! So now everyone |
| back to this shortly, but it turns out to be about | | | | really loves us.It's time to go, time to perform |
| food. The monks arrived, all nine of them, in the | | | | many wais, to say goodbye and to drive home. |
| back of a pickup truck. Dressed in their orange | | | | Neung is leaving for Amsterdam tonight to spend |
| robes it is a somewhat surreal scene. The | | | | 10 days with her gay Thai friend and his Dutch |
| strangest pickup delivery I have ever seen! We | | | | boyfriend. She tries to insist that she won't be |
| now have nine monks seated on the floor of the | | | | spending the entire 10 days finding a new |
| house, with about 25 guests seated all over the | | | | boyfriend but doesn't sound too credible. Mai pen |
| place. The rituals begin with an offering of water | | | | rai, this is not my problem anymore. If she is |
| to the monks. The candles are lit, the string is | | | | happy then I am happy too. She may be my ex |
| unwound, we all settle down and the chanting | | | | but she is still my friend and she has had a tough |
| begins.I can't be sure but it seemed to me that | | | | few months.The first Thai funeral I attended was |
| the chanting was much the same as at the | | | | for Neung's mother and it is for her also that I |
| funeral ceremonies. It's quite interesting to watch | | | | have made my first tambuun. It has been |
| and listen. It is melodic without being musical and | | | | another fascinating experience. The Thai people |
| mildly hypnotic. Hypnosis would have been useful | | | | manage death with a lot of grace, humor, tact |
| because I was in agony from sitting with crossed | | | | and respect. That's an odd mix of words perhaps |
| legs. My knees are shot from too much running at | | | | but it's an appropriate mix. I like the way they do |
| the gym and I find these very basic sitting | | | | this and I like to think that Neung's mother would |
| postures almost impossible to manage. So, for | | | | have been pleased with what she saw today. I |
| me, the chanting is an exercise in pain and the | | | | don't pretend to understand Buddhism or Thai |
| constant thought running through my mind of | | | | culture, but what I do see I like very much.As for |
| "how much longer"?A couple of dogs wander in | | | | Neung it has been a difficult time. Her mother was |
| and out as we sit and a little 2 year old girls | | | | her only family. Her father did not turn up today |
| comes to join us, holding her hands up in the | | | | and has apparently been asking her for money. |
| praying position. It's a very cute scene. She gets | | | | Her stepfather, aged 75, has been trying to |
| bored quickly, as 2 year olds do, and decides to | | | | transfer his affections for her mother to Neung |
| examine and take apart the padlock to the | | | | herself.She has been unhappy and she has cried |
| garden gate. Then she decides to try everyone | | | | alone a lot. I have not been able to spend much |
| else's shoes, flip flops, high heels, they are all of | | | | time with her. Today she seems happier than I |
| equal interest. I find my eyes wandering much | | | | have seen her in a long time. In part it's because |
| more to her than the business at hand.The | | | | she is going to Amsterdam but I think it is more |
| chanting ceases and now I learn why the monks | | | | than that. She has finally learned to say goodbye |
| arrived early. We are their lunch. I am told that | | | | to her mother.Thailand is sometimes truly a crazy |
| the monks eat twice a day, breakfast and lunch | | | | place. Crazy but wonderful and so very much |
| and that they may not eat after midday. They | | | | alive, even in death. I am privileged to be here.The |
| turned up early to be sure that they could get | | | | end. Original article available at from England, |
| lunch. Well that makes perfect sense to me. After | | | | Adam Bryan-Brown has lived in Bangkok for one |
| all, this country more than most, marches on its | | | | year having spent many years working in |
| stomach. Lunch is a feast. A mass of different | | | | businesses in the United Sates and Switzerland. |
| foods. They eat, we wait. Everyone seems happy | | | | After graduating from Oxford University, Adam |
| and there is a lot of laughing from everyone.I am, | | | | spent 20 years working in public relations.At the |
| of course, the only farang and the object of | | | | beginning of 2005 Adam set up his first |
| some attention. Many are asking Neung if I am | | | | independent company, 2nd AB Associates, a |
| her boyfriend. She says no, just a friend and that | | | | virtual public relations agency. artThailand was |
| I am gay. Hmmm, ok. Now where did that come | | | | created in January 2006 and is his second |
| from? Neung explains. If I say u are my friend | | | | independent venture. The company is committed |
| (puan) they will wonder why u are here so I called | | | | to promoting Thai contemporary art across the |
| u my gay friend. Hmm, ok. Why not say I am ur | | | | world.He is also a published writer and is currently |
| ex boyfriend. No way she says. If I say that I | | | | working on a book about his life in Thailand. His |
| lose face. So the price of not losing face is that I | | | | main interests are contemporary art and writing. |